Weddings can often throw up a lot of potential landmines with regards to issues such as seating arrangements and who to invite. Often it can be focused on whether or not to invite small children and whether or not to extend your invitation to a plus one.
We all read the hot debate of the latter topic when Pippa Middleton tied the knot last month and allegedly had a ‘no ring no bring’ invite policy with regards to her guests. It’s something that you really do need to think about as you go through your guest list. Do you do ultimately do a ‘Pippa’ or do you welcome guest’s partners or dates no matter how long they’ve been together?
It can be a thorny issue and is dependent on so many factors. Here’s some things to consider when thinking about how you’ll approach the topic for your wedding day.
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Budget & Venue
These two factors are key when it comes to how many guests and plus ones you can afford to have at your wedding day. You may be working with a strict budget, which means plus ones won’t be a given. Also you may have a small and intimate venue, which again will mean that you’ll have to scrutinise your plus ones.
No Ring No Invite?
This is a tricky issue, but it’s one you should decide on from the start. Do you automatically invite guest’s partners if they are in a long term relationship but not engaged or married? Or do you allow the guest to bring their boyfriend/girlfriend who they’ve only been seeing a short time. Or do you simply allow them to bring a date for the wedding? Decide on which works best for you and stick to it.
How Many Singletons?
If you’re likely to have a lot of singletons at the wedding, then extending plus ones may not be an issue as you can seat many of them together. However, if you only have a couple of single people attending, then you’ve got to take into account how much they will be able to enjoy your day if they are there effectively on their own.
Be Clear From the Start
If you don’t want to extend a plus one to a guest, then make this very clear by only putting their name on the invitation. Generally speaking people will immediately understand the situation when the see it’s only their name listed. If you do want to allow your guest to bring someone, then name them or put ‘plus guest’ but ensure you get their name for your seating plan.
Consider After the Meal
If you do feel under pressure to allow guests to bring more causal plus ones, then perhaps compromise and invite them to the ‘afters.’ This is when all of the formalities will be out of the way and all the guests will have their hair down so the fact that there will be a few partners whom you don’t know very well will be less of an issue.